Thursday, 30 June 2022
Quote, Carl Jung: "I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become."
She said, "I don't like talking about that, it brings up painful memories, but I want to be healed of my anxiety." I said, "You can't fix what you will not admit needs fixing." There it is saints, a battle that so many people are fighting and getting nowhere because of their strategy - I don't want to think about it!
If the memories of your past are not affecting your ability to function, and you feel things are copacetic, then move on and give life the best you can. However, if your memories are haunting you and causing anxious apprehension, which hinders your ability to move forward, then you have to confront that ever-present issue. How are we going to get healed of our past anguishing sore spots that keep showing up if we do not confront them and bring an end to their painful effects?
When a traumatic memory continually finds its way into our thoughts, then it is time to deal with and forgive the root reason that causes the reoccurring pain. In most cases, we will have to forgive those who did hurt us regardless of how awful the atrocity was, and we might have to also forgive ourselves as much as the others who were involved in causing the hurts that keep resurfacing. Forgiving ourselves is a hard row to hoe. We can be merciless with ourselves and more judgmental than Satan. The problem with this kind of self-punishment is that we end up giving the enemy of our soul ammunition to beat us up with while crying out to God for help. How neurotic is that?
Once the Holy Spirit prompts a person to acknowledge the hurts of their past, they would be wise to allow God to heal the emotional wounds that person carries. I remember the process I went through when God started nudging me toward forgiving my father for all the evil that he lashed out on my mother, siblings, and myself. It took a few years from the first promptings of the Holy Spirit until I was clear in my intentions to fully forgive my father. Through Christ, the Lord, and by faith, I finally received the healing that was given to me at the cross, and broke the shackles that bound my heart because of the anger and unforgiveness that was living there. The liberation and feelings of peace that filled all areas of my life, could not be adequately expressed or explained. All I can say is that when I forgave my father, I received my healing. Prov. 10:7a We have happy memories of the godly. Was it easy? No, but for me, it was necessary.
We have to realize that when the Lord is prompting our hearts to reason with Him and become healed from our painful memories, there is no better time to do it. God is leading the healing process and He will guide us through all that is needed to be done in the right way, even if it seems difficult to us. The Lord can be trusted not to betray our exposed souls and raw emotions because His intentions for our lives are always from His heart of affectionate love. Sng. 2:4b And his banner over me was love. God wants us healed and living in His peace.
There is an epidemic of mental pain and hurts throughout the world and it is just as prevalent in the church. The latest statistics of people who are looking for help because of anxiety, depression, loneliness, and mental disorders of every kind have exploded, and the services available to the public cannot tackle the backlog of people screaming for help. Is it any wonder the number of psychopathic eruptions throughout all aspects of life and locations is manifesting in such irrational behaviour? People who are at the end of their rope, are lashing out with whatever weapon is in arm's reach and destroying anything and anyone in front of them. This is madness gone to seed, because of the raging pain within.
It is easy to dispense advice and say one should be healed but how does a person go about it? I have counselled people in this area, and I have found a few methods that have worked and helped people take the step of faith toward their healing. For me, my step of faith in becoming healed was to write the whole story down on paper, leaving none of the gory details out. The words written came out in fits of anger and spewed expletives, and that was the way it was. The act of describing the events that caused my deep wounds were a tumultuous and teary experience, but still an act of faith.
I noticed that once all the horrific events were written down on paper, it seemed easier to voice my words of forgiveness toward my father. Once fully written, I tossed the stack of papers containing the vile story on the table, and as the collated papers slid along the tabletop, so did all the pain that was once in my heart. The old hurting memories were now in the pages that lay on the table and I could see that all the mess described was over there on the tabletop and no longer within me. Hallelujah, there is power in the name of Jesus, who heals all wounds when we call upon His name by faith for our healing.
I shared this method with someone who did the same as I did, but he took the process a step further. Not only did he write the whole sordid mess out with snot and tears staining the pages, (I didn't say this was going to be pretty) he then burned the pages as a symbol that his past life was now in ashes and he could rise out of the ashes whole and healed. I have also found that using a confessor who is a trusted friend, minister, or counsellor to spill your guts out and describe the whole pustulent mess in the full vernacular of expression, is also a step of faith forward toward confronting all the structures, devils, and people who were responsible for the past pains and traumas a person may be living with.
It is a strange dichotomy that some people can live through the most horrific events and move on without letting anything bother them. Then, there are so many who cannot move forward without voicing a roaring scream that can be heard in a distant galaxy because they are containers of torment. The enemy of our soul is working hard to make sure people remember their past pains while also impressing upon people's hearts to become unreceptive to the idea of forgiving the past that hurts so much. Satan puts in overtime, influencing people to focus on the agonies of the past and the fears of the future so that they do not live a victorious life in the present. The devil maneuvers people into a place where they are torn apart by two opposites of past and future, keeping them unstable in their thoughts and feelings. Their lives become a wasteland and their ability to live stagnates.
We cannot be slothful in this area of our lives when it is time to confront the burdens of past hurts. Otherwise, our lives will be a mess of thorns. weeds, and broken walls forever in need of repair. Prov. 24:30 I went by the field of the lazy man, and by the vineyard of the man devoid of understanding; 31 and there it was, all overgrown with thorns; its surface was covered with nettles; its stone wall was broken down. Why would anyone want to live that way if they do not have to? The healing of the memories is possible, but you have to want to do it. May God's healing hand be on us all, in Jesus name.
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Thursday, 5 May 2022
Proverbs 10:7 We have happy memories of the godly, but the name of a wicked person rots away.
Ecclesiastes 7:10 Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these?” For it is not wise to ask such questions. I once wrote, and I still believe, "The only good thing about the good old days is that they are gone," especially when the old days are the only thing a person thinks about. People can become so trapped in the past that they no longer try to live today.
It is much easier to deal with memories that are pleasant and joyful because they sometimes encourage us to believe in an optimistic future. Good memories are helpful as they can inspire us to realize that things can get better. It is a harder journey for a lot of people to deal with and try to manage the hurts that horrific memories bring back in living colour. The relenting torment of these aching recollections will keep people from advancing beyond their ever-present thoughts of how they were poorly treated. Continually thinking about the old hurts, and rehashing the events that created the dysfunction in their present lives, will have an unnatural control of their mind and will give no room for peace to be found.
The difficulty of being reconciled with our painful history can be overwhelming for some people and a never-ending torment for others. We are now seeing how the memories of the First Nation's children who were forced to attend residential schools are still feeling the repercussions they suffered. Those children are now elderly people who are still hurting. The effects on these people and their culture have got to be reconciled or the pain will continue to be a generational curse. The brutality and shaming practices that were allowed to be used upon these children at the time, were inhumane, and cruel. Yet, these people were expected to live inspired lives and function normally once returned to their homes. How could they not become maladaptive in their plight to function when they had so many questions that needed answers as to why they had been treated like a burden society had to rid themselves of.
The anguish that is suffered within the souls and spirits of anyone who has memories of being brutalized makes it hard for them to even believe there is healing for better things. Healing in the spirit is also needed as much as healing within the soul. Ex.6:9 So Moses spoke thus to the children of Israel; but they did not heed Moses, because of anguish of spirit and cruel bondage. Depressive and painful memories will keep many wallowing in hurtful reminiscence while keeping them stagnant from moving ahead. We have no choice but to reconcile with our hurtful past because if we do not face that pain with God's healing power, that dark shadow will negatively control our thoughts causing a repeat performance within the next generation.
Breaking this bondage will take the light of God that can stab any darkness and rip apart the gloom that has enveloped a heart and mind. However, we have to want that healing with all of our hearts. God's righteous fire burns everything and that includes the injustices we have suffered throughout our lives. I, for one, have had to forgive the events of my childhood to be able to live a healthy and meaningful life today. I had to forgive the brutality and abuse that my father dispensed on my mother, siblings, and myself. I have written extensively on the subject of my father's inability to have loved, nurtured, and protected his family. We cannot go back and fix the problem at the point where the torture took place, but with the Lord's forgiving grace we can be healed from the point where we choose to forgive. Matt. 6:14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
The problem for many who continue choosing the companion of old shadows that darken the present noonday brightness is that they will rewrite scenarios in their minds and will end up with a patchwork of selective memories that are distorting the real events that took place. The children of Israel had been set free by God but in their hearts, they were still slaves to their past. Num. 11:5 We remember the fish we used to eat for free in Egypt. And we had all the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic we wanted. 6 But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna! The manna was the healing bread that the Lord had provided each day for the collective healing of a nation. Yes, it was a daily food provision, but the morning reminder as the manna was gathered demonstrated that God their provider could meet anything needed to live in wholeness. However, as is today, if we do not accept God's healing and step into His redemptive health plan with an honest heart the result will be as it was with the children of Israel - an insipid idea of existence.
The choice is ours. We can either swim and bathe in the anointed love of God's present affection that will eventually heal all pain and hurts. Or, we can drown in the infectious waters of hurtful memories that move like the creatures in nightmares coming from beneath ready to bring us into a hell of loneliness. The Lord's salvation is too precious a gift to be ignored as the way back from our painful past. If we hand over one hurt after another until the healing balm of Christ's sacrifice makes us whole, we will eventually be healed. There are enough people in this world living with a shadow-sickness that gets darker as the days go by. We who are in Christ can live in the light of God's healing. Ex. 15:26b For I am the LORD who heals you. We just have to want it. In Jesus name, Lord God, help us call on Your name for the grace needed to choose life. Amen!